Mary Ellen Jade ... Dora The Explorer

Final Research Paper

2008-03-27T01:07:00.000-07:00

Establishing Relationships and Dealing with Self-Disclosure

(An Analysis Using Social Penetration Theory and Uncertainty Reduction Theory)

by Mary Ellen Jade D. Lebria

2007-75165

COMA101-B

Prof. Antonino Salvador S. de Veyra

March 27, 2008

The Communication Act

Rey and Nicole were in the library. They saw their classmate John entering into the library.

Nicole: Di ba, Kagrupo nato siya?

Rey: Lagi, Unsaon man nato ni?

Nicole: Adtuon nalang nato siya.

Rey: Ikaw lang gud uy!, Baga bitaw kag nawong!

Nicole: Dili ko uy!

Rey: Sige2x. Ay, maulaw man ko.

Rey stood up and went to John.

Rey: Ay, Ano… kanang, diba kagrupo man ta sa MST1? Sa, Ano, … sa Thursday na biya ang deadline ato. …

John: Ay, tama noh?, kanang…kanus.a man pwede kaya maghimo?

Rey: Ay, kanus.a diay ka free?

John: Kamo?… Kanang pwede man ata ta karon.

Rey: Ay sige, okay lang.

John: Magdiscuss nalang ta karon.

Rey: Ay, Bitaw, unsa ato kinahanglan?

John: Powerpoint prentation, 20 slides.

Rey: Ay, hala! Dapat mamugas jud ta! Kay medyo strict biya si Sir noh?

John: Lagi, OA Kaayo, hehe

Rey: Hala oy, mahuman kaya nato ni?

John: Mahuman lagi na, sa amoa gani dati akong mga kagrupo kay lisud kaayo kasabot.

Rey: Maayo gani, kay okay lang atong schedule.

John: Ay diba, naa pa’y isa ka requirement ta na ipass? Group work pud ba toh?

Rey: Ay oh!, hehehe, wala pa gud me kagroup. Ikaw?

John: Ay pwede kita lang gihapon magkagroup? Kung okay lang?

Rey: Ay sige, okay lang. Kanang magsabot nalang ta, okay lang na ikaw nalang maghimo sa ppt.presentation?… Wala man gud ko’y computer, sabutan nalnag nato unsay ibutang.

John: Ay, Sige, okay lang. …Pero, wala pud biya ko’y computer., Pero sige lang. Sa Ilc nalang.

Rey: Hala dili biya kaayo jud ko maayo anang ppt. Pero mutabang nalang ko sa ibutang ha?! Ikaw?

John: Ay, okay lang, ako nalang bahala.

I discussed the communication act by applying two theories of communication. To explain on how these three persons possess their certainty levels and how they evaluate their vulnerability with each other.

II. The Theories

Social Penetration Theory

I chose the Social Penetration Theory by Irwin Altman and Dalmas Taylor and the Uncertainty Reduction Theory by Chuck Berger. The first can be used in the early stages of Rey and John’s communication and the second one will somehow describe the process and the possible outcome of their relationship, respectively.

According to Altman and Taylor, Social Penetration theory explains how relational closeness develops. They further explained it by comparing people to onions, that if a person peels the outer skin from an onion, he or she will find another surface behind it. This theory deals with people’s relational disclosure. It states that the main route to deep social penetration is through self-disclosure.

Uncertainty Reduction Theory

I chose the Uncertainty Reduction Theory to explain the given situation. This theory suggests that “High levels of uncertainty decreases the level of intimacy, and low levels of uncertainty leads to high levels of intimacy,” (Griffin, 2006, p.133). This theory will guide me in explaining the process that the three actors in my communication act have undergone during the process of knowing and communicating with each other.

Analysis based on the Social Penetration Theory

In the conversation:

Rey: Ay, Ano… kanang, diba kagrupo man ta sa MST1? Sa, Ano, … sa Thursday na biya ang deadline ato. …

For few minutes, Rey stood and went to John. Just as having the purpose of telling the main reason why Rey communicated with him. Sizing up took place in Rey’s part. Being the first to trade the thought, Rey didn’t know how he is going to relay the message. Rey was thinking of a deeper sense if what kind of topic of conversation that suits appropriately during first meeting of acquaintances. Avoidance of personal ways of interaction took place between their conversations.

When John gave a reply, “Ay, tama noh?, kanang…kanus.a man pwede kaya maghimo?” he also showed equal levels of vulnerability, but they’re not that open at all. Somehow, in their first meeting they showed equal level of surface talk. In which, that if they allotted more time to exchange conversations, it is not possible that they can peel a part of their onion.

As pointed out from Altman and Taylor’s framework outlined observations, which is known as the Law of Reciprocity, “self-disclosure is reciprocal, especially in the early stages of relationship development,” (Griffin, 2006 p.121). This theory predicts that new acquaintances will reach roughly equal levels of openness. When Rey won’t peel a surface of him, or he will only show surface talks all the time, thus John would probably do on what Rey did. But if one of them will peel a surface of their being, the other member would also do the same thing. On this situation, the first two exchanging lines of conversations, they only showed the same level of openness. Having this law of reciprocity, a give-and-take exchange in which each party is sharing equal levels of vulnerability. It’s up to them if they will peel or not some skin of their onion.

In the part of Rey and John’s conversation, specifically:

Rey: Ay, kanus.a diay ka free?

John: Kamo?… Kanang pwede man ata ta karon.

Rey: Ay sige, okay lang.

John: Magdiscuss nalang ta karon.

In this part, they are still trying to adjust to each other. They asked each other’s preference on when they wanted to do the project. They’re undergoing the process of penetration but still on the outer surface. They were trying to consult to when each other will be comfortable. And not even touching or penetrating each of their personal level, rather, they’re still at their relatively impersonal level. This situation may also be further explained by Arthur VanLear’s study (as cited in Griffin, 2006: p.121) that showed 14 percent of the particular communication act he studied revealed nothing about the speaker, and even only 2 percent disclosed intimate confidences. At this part, we witnessed that both the speakers still did not reveal much about themselves. This shows that people when they first meet do not easily disclose themselves and their wants, and instead adjusts themselves to other people’s preference. There were no intimate details about themselves that were shared in this part.

The next part that will be presented is the time when both of them manifested disclosure in their conversation and start to reveal something personal about their feelings.

Rey: Ay, hala! Dapat mamugas jud ta! Kay medyo strict biya si Sir noh?

John: Lagi, OA Kaayo, hehe

Rey opened a part of his feelings in their conversation just as John also did, like saying his emotions and other expressions. So, exposing his degree of intimacy with John, they penetrated deeper their uncertainty and manifested a degree of personal disclosure. As viewed by Altman and Taylor, the depth of penetration represents the degree of personal disclosure.

On the next lines of conversations, stated that:

Rey: Hala oy, mahuman kaya nato ni?

John: Mahuman lagi na, sa amoa gani dati akong mga kagrupo kay lisud kaayo kasabot.

Rey opened up a topic, which deals with his opinions. With that phrase, he is opening a topic to be discussed, just like a not so serious matter, if they won’t be able to finish doing their project. He allowed himself to open up while John also shared his point of view. John ended up his answer by comparing his relationship with his previous group from the other subject. Comparing past relationships can be also explained by the theory. John had “judged the value of his relationship by comparing it to the baseline of his past experience”. He had concluded then that they can finish their project since he believed that the group he belonged now is better than he had before.

Some points by Altman and Taylor say that “a relational result has meaning only when we contrast it with other real or imagined outcomes” (Griffin, 2006, p.124). Somehow, John had evaluated and assumed his relationship with his new group based on imagined outcome of their group work.

Social exchange theory offers two standard of comparison that others use to evaluate their interpersonal outcomes. The first is Comparison level, which deals with “satisfaction on how happy or sad an interpersonal outcome makes a participant feel,” (Griffin, 2006, p. 124). I can somehow say that both of the boys feel happy about their group mates. John is already excited about his perceived outcomes out of the relationship. Visible in the situation that John is not satisfied or contented with his previous group. Comparing and evaluating the group makes him look for the one in which he would be better with.

The next portion of the conversation tells what the alternative that John ended up with is.

Rey: Maayo gani, kay okay lang atong schedule.

John: Ay diba, naa pa’y isa ka requirement ta na ipass? Group work pud ba toh?

Rey: Ay oh!, hehehe, wala pa gud me kagroup. Ikaw?

John: Ay pwede kita lang gihapon magkagroup? Kung okay lang?

As John asks Rey about their requirements, he is expecting for an act that they could possibly be group mates in their next project. The second standard of comparison is the Comparison Level of Alternatives (CL_alt). It gauges the relative stability of a relationship. John perceives an available and is more attractive outside possibilities with them. He chose them as an outside alternative that promises stability.

Rey: Ay sige, okay lang. Kanang magsabot nalang ta, okay lang na ikaw nalang maghimo sa ppt.presentation?… Wala man gud ko’y computer, sabutan nalnag nato unsay ibutang.

John: Ay, Sige, okay lang. …Pero, wala pud biya ko’y computer., Pero sige lang. Sa Ilc nalang.

From this latter part of the conversation, as Rey accepted what John pleaded, he then put into his mind what can he benefit from him. According to John Stuart Mill, stated his principle of utility. The minimax principle claims that people seek to maximize their benefits and minimize their costs. Outcome: Reward minus Costs.

Rey: Hala dili biya kaayo jud ko maayo anang ppt. Pero mutabang nalang ko sa ibutang ha?! Ikaw?

John: Ay, okay lang, ako nalang bahala.

Thus, Rey tend to ask John if he could do on the powerpoint presentation. Again they comfortably disclose and show their capabilities, weaknesses, and their other behavior to other people when they knew and have shown to both parties the depth of relationship they had.

Analysis according to Uncertainty Reduction Theory:

At the very beginning of the conversation, it is when Rey was still talking to Nicole:

Nicole: Di ba, Kagrupo nato siya?

Rey: Lagi, Unsaon man nato ni?

Nicole: Adtuon nalang nato siya.

Rey: Ikaw lang gud uy!, Baga bitaw kag nawong!

Nicole: Dili ko uy!

Rey: Sige2x. Ay, maulaw man ko.

As cited from the Uncertainty Reduction theory, “No matter how close two people eventually become, they always begin as strangers” (Griffin, 2006, p.130). Strangers usually begin with uncertainty in their relationship. By the manner Rey and Nicole communicates, it shows that they are very certain between themselves, but both of them begins as strangers. The first axiom by Charles Berger’s eight truths about initial uncertainty deals with Verbal Communication. This axiom states that as uncertainty is further reduced, the amount of verbal communication will increase. By the line, “Rey: Ikaw lang gud uy!, Baga bitaw kag nawong!”, it lays that the amount of uncertainty in their relationship decreases. The flowing of words in their mouth let them speak with each other confidently and exhibits a greater amount of verbal communication. If they are strangers in the first place, they won’t be able to exchange words in this verbal manner.

As viewed from the second axiom Nonverbal Warmth, tells that as nonverbal affiliative expressiveness increases, uncertainty levels will decrease in an initial interaction situation.

When Nicole delivered her line:” Nicole: Dili ko uy!”, she established an act of intimacy between herself and Rey. Intimacy took place because Nicole can express her feelings openly and she further disclosed her behavior and personality with Rey maybe because they are already together for a long time as blocmates.

On the situation that Rey stood up and came to John, the primary concern here is on how to lessen the uncertainty between them. He anticipates how he would communicate with John. On the line:

Rey: Ay, Ano… kanang, diba kagrupo man ta sa MST1? Sa, Ano, … sa Thursday na biya ang deadline ato. …

John: Ay, tama noh?, kanang…kanus.a man pwede kaya maghimo?

As being emphasized in axiom 1, Verbal Communication, it states that “as the amount of verbal communication between strangers increases, the level of uncertainty for each interactant in the relationship will decrease”, (Griffin, 2006, p.132). Rey still hesitates to speak up with John. He had no choice but to speak up with him, so as they communicate verbally, they tend to lessen their level of uncertainty.

The next part of the conversation, specifically:

Rey: Ay, kanus.a diay ka free?

John: Kamo?… Kanang pwede man ata ta karon.

Rey: Ay sige, okay lang.

John: Magdiscuss nalang ta karon.

Rey: Ay, Bitaw, unsa ato kinahanglan?

John: Powerpoint prentation, 20 slides.

At this stage, they still have a lot of uncertainties that may be the reason why they keep on asking each other questions. Also, at this point, the conversation is more on information seeking, which may be influenced by the fact that they are still not that acquainted with each other.

Rey: Ay, hala! Dapat mamugas jud ta! Kay medyo strict biya si Sir noh?

John: Lagi, OA kaayo, hehe

On this part, when Rey told his line, he chose to open his self to John. He tells something that he and John would be able to agree at the same point. As cited from Axiom 6, Similarity, “between persons reduce uncertainty, while dissimilarities produce increases in uncertainty” (Griffin, 2006, p.133). Rey cited a particular situation wherein, he did know that John would agree with what he is going to say. John opened up a part of him and somehow lessens his level of uncertainness with Rey. He then uses his verbal communication to let the flow of their communication runs through their conversation. Thus, John also gave an approval and added some additional account about their topic.

In this next conversation:

Rey: Hala oy, mahuman kaya nato ni?

John: Mahuman lagi na, sa amoa gani dati akong mga kagrupo kay lisud kaayo kasabot.

Rey: Maayo gani, kay okay lang atong schedule.

John: Ay diba, naa pa’y isa ka requirement ta na ipass? Group work pud ba toh?

Rey: Ay oh!, hehehe, wala pa gud me kagroup. Ikaw?

John: Ay pwede kita lang gihapon magkagroup? Kung okay lang?

As cited from (Griffin, 2006, p.134), in axiom 6, Liking: it states that increasing in uncertainty level produce decreases in liking; decreases in uncertainty produce increases in liking. John tends to like the company with Rey, he then compares his previous group to them. John first open the topic about their other requirement, it probably means that he is less uncertain with them. When he asks them if they wanted them to be their group mate, it exhibits that he also like the friendship they have. The more he opened his shell to them, the more he able to like them. The more he contrast and appreciates the company he’s working with, the more he likes them the more he lessens his uncertainty level with Rey and Nicole.

The Next conversation follows:

Rey: Ay sige, okay lang. Kanang magsabot nalang ta, okay lang na ikaw nalang maghimo sa ppt.presentation?… Wala man gud ko’y computer, sabutan nalnag nato unsay ibutang.

John: Ay, Sige, okay lang. …Pero, wala pud biya ko’y computer., Pero sige lang. Sa Ilc nalang.

Rey: Hala dili biya kaayo jud ko maayo anang ppt. Pero mutabang nalang ko sa ibutang ha?! Ikaw?

John: Ay, okay lang, ako nalang bahala.

As to how each one of them revealed the notion about themselves, they also tend to seek information to whom their dealing with. According to Axiom 3, Information Seeking, (Griffin, 2006, p. 133), High levels of uncertainty cause increases in information-seeking behavior. As uncertainty levels decline, information-seeking behavior decreases. Rey told John if he could work on the powerpoint presentation, John could somehow think if why did Rey can’t work on it. It is just only a powerpoint presentation. Also, if why is it he is giving job to him and let to offer himself to just help find some information that can be added to their project.

Summary

As a whole, the communication act and the process of the development of the relationships were explained through the Social Penetration Theory and the Uncertainty Reduction Theory.

These theories suggests about self-disclosure, on how to know a person and on how to reduce the uncertainty level of new acquaintance. People interact with other people by means of communication, and on the same process, the relationships are influenced through the communication process. As to show if one is able to deal and open himself to other stranger, he has to observe and try to find out how he can communicate and deal with relationships well with acquaintances.

People’s relationship begins primarily as strangers. As people decide and continue revealing their personal information with other people, they would end up by having good relationships. In the beginning of some relationships, they started at no-person communication and end up by closely related beings.

Works cited:

Altman, I., & Taylor, D., (1973). Social Penetration: The Development of Interpersonal Relationships. NewYork: Holt, Rinehart and Winston

Cragan, J. F., & Shields, D.C. (1998). Understanding communication theory: The communicative forces for human action. Boston, MA: Allyn & Bacon.

Griffin, Em . A first Look at Communication Theory. New York: McGraw-Hills Co., 2006

Littlejohn, S. W. (1999). Theories of human communication (6th ed). Belmont, CA: Wadsworth. pp. 266-7

VanLear, C. A. (1991). Testing a cyclical model of communicative openness in relationship development: Two longitudinal studies. Communication Monographs, 58. p. 337-361.

Wood, JuliaT. Communication Theories in Action: An Introduction, California , USA Wadsworth Publiching Co., 1^st edition, 1995

Research proposal (new)

2008-02-04T18:46:00.001-08:00

Research Title:

A study to determine which is more effective between Text Messaging and Face-to-Face Communication in Communicating

Background:
Centuries ago, technology is not yet a big deal for every person, text messaging is not the primary means of communication. People interact with each other in a face-to-face manner, or if they are far away from each whoever, they tend to write a telegram, nothing more, to wait for a span of time.

Today's generation, as people become inclined with technology, they also try to figure out or evaluate things in a more trendy manner. It is visible that almost every person have their own cellphone, used to communicate to any kind of reasons, purposes, and information they incline to deliver. It is a medium that fits in all-ages as a part of their communicating life.
But in such case, the main issue being raised here is which is more effective between text messaging and face-to-face communication as the means of communicating. Face-to-face means to deal with a person personally, by talking directly to him. Some cases show misinterpretation on messages being transported from the sender to the receiver and have reached this extent that some may argue just because of a simple matter. It doesn't mean that only in text messaging, messages can only be misinterpreted. Even though in face-to-face conversation, intonation, expression, and the manner how he told his lines may be some of the reasons for an information to be misconceived. Real life experiences show that in F2F, a person may doubt if the one whom his talking to is expressing a snobbish behavior. Thus, he also tend to put on his mind a conflicting issue among their argument

Elaboration Likelihood Model

2008-01-27T21:57:00.000-08:00

1. Globe Load Commercial-

Central Route

Globe load... is a commercial that has something to do with relevance to all globe sim users. For me, it is a persuasive commercial because it attempts to steer one's thinking in a direction that will likely benefit the receiver or the user.

Central route refers to this advertisement because I am able to go beyond the given information and added some convincing factor, for me to get in more news about it. Even though it also involves a matter of interest, I can get some benefits from it. It also gives me encouragement to do so, thus, giving me enough motivations to switch and search more about this Globe Load commercial.

Personally,I'm a Globe user, I usually listen to the news breaks or advertisements that involves Globe Freebies, Awards, Features and, New offers or latest Services that they could offer. (e.g. GSulitxt)... Thus, changing my attitude, allowing me or convincing me to load more because I can get some Bonusload if load with this given quantity in such favorable date.

2. Olay Commercial-

Peripheral Route

Olay is a commercial many of people,(specifically Filipinos) love to see, I mean to watch. it is not only because of the commercial endorser, but also because of the truth that most of us Filipino men/women don't have this fair skin. honestly, many women are trying to make themselves whiter from what their skin looks now. this product persuades people to buy it, because they knew that even how expensive this OLAY is, the capability and the will to become whiter of the viewers will prevail.

I'm not an OLAY user, I'm not also using Beauty products... Personally, even though I don't have this fair skin, I don't usually get involve and have usage of this product, I don't have any interests in this kind of things... It doesn't have any relevance in my side. I didn't pay much attention in this matter.

It doesn't struck me and even the endorser is Miss Gretchen Barreto, it only shows that the product itself is much expensive from other products... I'm not giving even a single kind of discouragement to those who are using the said product. But it is only a matter of interest. I'm not motivated to use this product only because it's not my interest at all.

And it doesn't have any lasting effect after viewing it.

Jim And Shelley's story.... A Somebody's Concerned Letter... that captivates someone's emotion

2008-01-16T05:01:00.000-08:00

Oh mama!!! It's really pfhoooo!!!
Bonjour Jim!!!
Sorry, hehe, Just listen, but you also have to read this stuff... Don't interrupt!!!

As a concerned person about you and your girlfriend, Shelley, I just want to give you a piece of advice...

Every person has their own self-variation, evryone of us does have our own self-rule. In your case, the more you insist that you want to know what is the content of what is Shelley's writing on her diary, the more she hides it below her pillow or somewhere she can burry it for the daytime while she's with with you. She also wonder why is it that you're interested with it... It's a matter of trust!!! Although how tight you embrace your closeness with each other, there is this invisible thing called privacy! Even though to our parents, there are times that we can make secrets about what had happened or what we are thinking because we reason out that we have our own privacy!!! Good for you because Shelley didn't allow such things to be in secret, like telling her parents that you have this relationship!!! because some girls, do relationships secretely!!!

No relationship can exist by definition unless the parties sacrifice some individual's autonomy. However, too much connection paradoxically destroys the relationship because the individual identities become lost.

Everybody wants a bit of mystery, the touch of sponteinsity, the ocxasssional surprise that are necessary for having fun. Without the spice of variety to season our time together, the relationship becomes bland, boring and ultimately, emotionally dead. Especially you are not a married couple, there's a lot of things you might not tell to on eor the other. Self-disclosure anbd privacy operate in a cyclical, or wavelike, fashion over time thus, everyone's relationship aren't on a straight-line path to intimacy... Somebody needs a nonrecuring resource that gives them some breathing room to work through problems.

You must not insist taht you want to know what she wrote on her diary becuase you might lose your personal foundation with each other. You must still prevail your communication with Shelley because it creates and sustain your relationship...

KEEP IN TOUCH with each other....
UP here... it's too late to be in mintal ALONE!!!
The dorm is waiting for me...

P.S.
mary ellen jade

A piece of advice yoh!!!.... A concerned person's PRESCRIPTION...

2008-01-16T04:02:00.000-08:00

OH... intensifying... Grrrhh!!!
I'm still out my mind right now and I really do have to made it...
Si! Probably yes...

A piece of advice!!! Whoever you are, whatever you do, I'm always right here to give you a piece of advice!!!

I'm just also a whoever but it's the time, giving you what you need!!!
Just listen, oh I mean read, I'm probably known as Dora, and as dora, just want to tell you that you're a person, a simply problematic person about family, I can relate to you, but the difference is that, i don't smoke and I don't have any vices, only like you, whose main problem in life is my family... I also did some unpleasant manner and high tones of voice when I made some responses to our conversations, yet I know how to do the right thing, I'm not eventually practicing it.. Don't mind and follow me, I'm not yet done with my advice!!!

Well, to start with, FAMILY !!! It's your family, nothing stops you from escaping in the realm of reality!!! In times of needs, to whom would you go to ask for some? Friends? Oh, illusion!!! In some ways, yes, but almost everytime!. Your manners, attitudes, and values were really normal, and I can see that you're just acting at your age.. youth were just like you... Aren't they? your mother might misses you for a span of time, I guess?!, eventhough you don't speak a single word, she is your mother, from pregnancy up to childhood, up to adolesence, up to what you become today, she is your mother... She knows you, more than whoever does. my friend, according to Watzalwick, effective change for the whole family will come about only when members are steped outside the sysytem and see teh self-defeating nature of the rules under which they're playing. He calls this process reframing. you could just reframe your attitudes as unrealistic and immature. Have a book of adjustments, change your self-rule, your perspective, an your view in life. Each family member occupies a role taht serves teh status-quo.

So to your problem about your sister, just don't mind her at all, even me, I'm the youngest in the family, I'm the only girl! In fact, we are more severe than your' case.. we tend to ask each other if we are siblings, it's because my brother told me that he can't feel me as his sister, in fact it's a great insult in my side... so, it's a normal thing.. She felt that you are more loved by your parents than her.. so that's it... Solve your problem with a matter of efficiency! Balnce your family with your other activities...

UP HERE!!!
P.S.
mary ellen jade

An article that strucks a child's heart

2008-01-15T18:51:00.000-08:00

Sa aking Anak,

Sa aking pagtanda, unawain mo sana ako at pagpasensiyahan.

Kapag dala ng kalabuan ng mata ay nakabasag ako ng pinggan o nakatapon ng sabaw sa hapag kainan, huwag mo sana akong kagagalitan. Maramdamin ang isang matanda. Nagse-self-pity ako sa tuwing sinisigawan mo ako.

Kapag mahina na ang tenga ko at hindi ko maintindihan ang sinasabi mo, huwag mo naman sana akong sabihan ng "binge!" paki-ulit nalang ang sinabi mo o pakisulat nalang. Pasensya ka na, anak. Matanda na talaga ako.

Kapag mahina na ang tuhod ko, pagtiyagaan mo sana akong tulungang tumayo, katulad ng pag-aalalay ko sa iyo noong nag-aaral ka pa lamang lumakad.

Pagpasensyahan mo sana ako kung ako man ay nagiging makulit at paulit-ulit na parang sirang plaka. Basta pakinggan mo nalang ako.
Huwag mo sana akong pagtatawanan o
pagsasawaang pakinggan.

Natatandaan mo anak noong bata ka pa? kapag gusto mo ng lobo, paulit-ulit mo 'yong sasabihin, maghapon kang mangungulit hangga't hindi mo nakukuha ang gusto mo. Pinagtyagaan ko ang kakulitan mo.

Pagpasensyahan mo na rin sana ang aking amoy. Amoy matanda, amoy lupa. Huwag mo sana akong piliting maligo. Mahina na ang katawan ko.
Madaling magkasakit kapag nalamigan,
huwag mo sana akong pandirihan.
Natatandaan mo noong bata ka pa?
pinatyagaan kitang habulin sa ilalim ng kama kapag ayaw mong maligo.

Pagpasensyahan mo sana kung madalas, ako'y masungit, dala na marahil ito ng katandaan. Pagtanda mo, maiintindihan mo rin.

Kapag may konti kang panahon,
magkwentuhan naman tayo, kahit sandali lang. Inip na ako sa bahay, maghapong nag-iisa. Walang kausap.

Alam kong busy ka sa trabaho,
subalit nais kong malaman mo na sabik
na sabik na akong makakwentuhan ka,
kahit alam kong hindi ka interesado sa mga kwento ko.

Natatandaan mo anak, noong bata ka pa? Pinagtyagaan kong pakinggan at intindihin ang pautal-utal mong kwento tungkol sa iyong teddy bear.

At kapag dumating ang sandali na ako'y magkakasakit at maratay sa banig ng karamdaman, huwag mo sana akong pagsawaang alagaan.

Pagpasensyahan mo na sana kung ako
man ay maihi o madumi sa higaan,
pagtyagaan mo sana akong alagaan sa mga huling sandali ng aking buhay.
Tutal hindi na naman ako magtatagal.

Kapag dumating ang sandali ng aking pagpanaw, hawakan mo sana ang aking kamay at bigyan mo ako ng lakas ng loob na harapin ang kamatayan.

At huwag kang mag-alala, kapag kaharap ko na ang Diyos na lumikha, ibubulong ko sa kanya na pagpalain ka sana ... dahil naging mapagmahal ka sa iyong ama't ina...

Communication...

2008-01-09T19:17:00.000-08:00

The different perceptions of people... The way we judge... About a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship...

According to my recent communication act, no matter how close two people eventually

become, they always begin as strangers.

The essence of this act is to know the different perceptions of people about what they

see around their surroundings. Especially when they know that those people do have a

relationship (like a boyfriend - girlfriend matter). In our generation, it is so usual that you

can see and you can encounter these things, but for our dear elders, or our parents, some of

them may act traditionally. I also want want to prove that different expectations may lead to

somewhere else. As we predict different expectations to these people, we also prejudge

ourselves who we are C. Berger believes that it's natural to have doubts about our ability to

predict the outcome of initial encounters. Nonverbal messages could also assert actions that

may be misinterpreted by these receivers of actions. Also, Davis notes that " the beginnings

of personal relationships are fraught with uncertainties." Central to present theory is the

assumption that when strangers meet, their primary concern is one of uncertainty reduction

or increasing predictability about the behavior of both themselves and others in the

interaction.

A theory found in our prescribed book may give us an additional information.

(Griffin ) This theory being tackled is the Uncertainty Reduction Theory by: Charles

Berger, (Chapter 9) Berger's Uncertainty Reduction Theory focuses on how human

communication is used to gain knowledge and create understandings. Another additional

theory is the Expectancy Violations Theory by: Judee Burgoon. This theory is concerned

with the structure of primarily nonverbal messages. It asserts that when communicative

norms are violated, the violation may be perceived either favorably or unfavorably,

depending on the perception that the receiver has of the violator. Violating another's

expectations may be a strategy used over that of conforming to another's expectations.

My Communication Act

2008-01-02T18:20:00.000-08:00

The coming of my brother's fiancee.... and spent a mini vacation with us...

It is the most common type of act, but (can applied to on or more values of communication), more than one values of communication can be applied to it. We can have the interpersonal, intercultural and the intrapersonal communication.

A day, a cold naughty day, the weather's not gently communicating with my temperature, and all I want to do is to sleep all day long 'till future comes... The striking of the sun's radiance munched my day. Countervailing my will, I'm forced to duty as a denizen in our chaotic home. Back then my big brother went to Davao to come along with his girlfriend back to our home.

I'm imagining what kind of girl she is, if she doesn't have anything against the world, if how countless' breastplates of protection she carried with her. not just for me to bite her... It's my first encounter with her when she got to our house... So that's why I have no idea about her.

Here comes my pompous self. I thought of myself as an owner of our place.... I'm an industrious person when it comes to personality and also according to my will and my mood... but when we had our general cleaning for the Christmas, I thought we would do it for our dearly own visitor. that's why?!

This treatise of mine could be easily get into my mind... and because when I was thinking of an act that can be studied, it directly comes into my mind that I have to site an unusual act.
Honestly, I felt tremulously about her. Because she's a self-spoken person, and I can't understand why she and my brother were the persons who go and roam by themselves. And they won't allow me to go with them. I really felt awkward upon having her, thus true colors of mine really appeared when I get angry with my brother. Therefore, I often get angry too.

That's my Christmas vacation lasts for about two weeks of unknown and chaotic world in our home. The more I felt uncertain about her, the more I felt hesitant about her... the more our intimacy gets higher and higher...

Dora the Explorer's Journey

2007-12-20T02:54:00.000-08:00

Hello Bonjour....
Hi my Friends...
I'm Mary Ellen Jade D. Lebria

Do You know me?
I'm a BA Communication Arts student
@ University of the Philippines Mindanao
You can visit me @ maryellenjade.blogspot.com

It's my adventure with friends...
Want to view some?

Here's one...

Another one...

Another one...

That's all my friend...

You want some more???

We'll till then,... Next time...